Absence and longing

And, as always, when I check myself out the everday treadmill for just a while, and make myself temporarily unavailable, the whole word comes falling down on me the minute I drop back into business. Which means I am overloaded with neglections and missings and news and ordeals; from every corner of the online communities and networking branches. As for the morale; I should of course know, by now, that news and net acsessibility is the source for keeping one's existence stable, and must thus be maintained. In the midst of working, writing, making arrangements; one can't allow onself such pauses of self-induced tech-freedom, one must always be alert. This is the foremost instruction to be written on all cribs for all new members of our society and its growing generations. With a bit of self-reproach, though, seeing that I'm (obviously) far too dependant on my computer and my broadband and my tech in general; also, that without internet access in a non-holiday period, I go completely mental - out of fear of lose track of things. Which is not good; in any and every sense. Because you do lose out! And you do fall behind! This new era of modern technology set the bars extremely high for contant presence and paying attention, also reflecting how the worls becomes increasingly demanding to live in; you gotta be there, you gotta stay sharp, and you gotta be ready. To paraphrase certain WHO-people (again). The minute you log out, or blink, or fully close your eyes; meaning, whenever you feel like taking a break, the news travels faster than you, outrun you; and the world catches up, so you're no longer ahead and you gotta play faster. Back to speed, back to nonchalanse, back to ease - over the fact that you're informed, now, that you're in on society's toll and the passings of time and events. That you're focused. It takes quite an effort. It drains me of all the energy I get from the various breaks that are allowed. But, naturally, despite the catastrophic proportions that I depict here, there's a sense of humour to the whole situation. I do get a smile out of being over-dramatic. Acting out more sensitivity than I actually behold. But I do care, probably too much, and I approach this set of problems from a somewhat double, contemplative viewpoint.

For the results of my failing to be there might not be that severe, but they're still...influential, and marks something of a loss to me, personally, that again causes some frustration and worry and personal discontent. I don't like being unavailable, I don't like not being able to check the news online. I don't like shutting myself out of the world, even though it could gain me a small break from the harsh and heavy reality that's out there. But, to clear up matters a bit, how did I bring about this short, but apparently consequential absence in the first place? How could I ever bestow such disastruous circumstances upon myself? Well, out of pure necessity, to be honest - for I had to send my computer to, er, rehab for a day because of a fawlty motherboard, and consequently; this evening I've been stuck online for hours, trying to get my head around the digital universe and all its, er, various updates. Well, not that very varied actually. More like limited down to a specific british agenda. Checking newspapers, gossip columns, e-mails and - to tell you the truth - mostly ended up skimming Daily Mail. And last, but not least - on a regular April first, with no unusual weather-, breathing- or other conditions, and with the fangirling so far kept to a squee minimum - I made a fatal discovery. So, last but not least, this how I almost died:

[Images: Remember me talking about how I was awaiting a picture of Billie and David together, as in properly visible? And, preferrably smiling? Well here they are. Together. Smiling, too. And now I really have to stop hopping around.]

It seems so long to wait until this Saturday! Updates revealed by the hour, as are the spoilerish details, as are the TV-magazine covers, and now the lists of episodes is almost complete - with some thanks to this week's spoiler-packed Radio Times:

DOCTOR WHO SERIES FOUR, 2008:

1. Partners in Crime - Russel T. Davies (RTD), where The Doctor is reunited with Donna and gets to meet her family. Also, Bernard Cribbins co-star, reprising his role as Wilfred Mott from "Voyage of the Damned" - wheyhoooo! Lovely man! And, fortunately, not such a long wait. Coming up this saturday!
2. The Fires of Pompeii - James Moran, where The Doctor finally gets to view the vulcan calamity first hand and where Donna gets happy about getting to go to Italy (along with the Who-crew, seeing that they filmed the episode in Rome...!) but finds herself slightly...disappointed with the circumstances surrounding the visit, I suppose.
3. Planet of the Ood - Keith Temple, where we meet the Odd Ood again - but this time, without Rose's fancy jacket. Without any Rose at all, in fact. Which means there's no way it's going be as great as in one of my all-time-favourite DW-two-parters: "The Impossible Planet"/"The Satan Pit", which the producers seem to love repeating in various ways. First copying straightaway in "42", no this. And consequently, I don't really like the thought of the particular Episode, for it is sure to remind me just how much I miss Rose and how much I loved the two originals.
4. The Sontaran Stratagem - Helen Raynor, where The Doc meets an old enemy that'll probably try to kill him. She wrote the Dalek-episodes of Series 3, which had the exact same plotlines and the exact same build-up, and they sucked. So, no great expectations; I'll be blissfully surprised instead. But, happy times, the fabulous UNIT-crew returns!
5. The Poison Sky - Helen Raynor, where the old enemy probably tries to kill The Doctor (again) and naturally doesn't succeed. Helen might, though. Also, UNIT is still in for the ride.
6. The Doctor's Daughter - Stephen Greenhorn, where fifth Doctor Peter Davison's real-life daughter Georgia Moffet gets to star as The Doctor's daughter. Which promises to be nothing but exceptionally weird and - let's hope - angstfully brilliant.
7. The Unicorn & The Wasp - Gareth Roberts, where Donna and The Doc run into Agatha Chrisitie, of all people, as played by David Tennant's best friend (and one of my favourite British actresses) Fenella Woolgar.
8. Silence in the Library - Steven Moffat, where the genius gets to be genius again, and for once I'm not referring to The Doctor.
9. River's Run - Steven Moffat, where the genius actually gets to prove his genius for the second time in one series.
10. Midnight - RTD, where we're plunged straight into the thriller that is another filler-episode one of these that might be extremely bizarre or possibly fantastic or both. We know nothing about it, except that The Doctor and Donna apparently visit an alien planet spa. And it's written by the man who gave us "Love and Monsters" for number ten, in series 2. Oh God. At least there's the title to like.
11. Turn Left - RTD, which marks the length of my waiting, for this is when Billie turns up. Hence, this is (definately!) the episode we're all anticipating the most. Affectionately known by fans as "the really crowded episode with all the wimminz". Meaning it's stuffed with old companions and villains, including Sarah Jane, Rose, Martha, Jack, Jackie, Mickey, possibly UNIT, K-9, Davros, The Rani and/or The Master. Oh yeah!
12. TBA - RTD, where Billie hopefully gets to continue turning up, and whose title is so "revealing" they don't even want to announce it yet, which is of course an act plain evil towards us suffering fan(girl)s. Also, I'm officially scared.
13. Journey's End - RTD, with the scariest title so far, throughout all the four seasons, and we are already speculating just how the ending to the journey will be constructed and what journeys that will actually come to and end. Hopefully, no sequel to "Doomsday", no horrible deaths, no regenerations, no losing of female companions, no "Star Wars"-ripoffs, no inappropriate pop music, but - on the contrary - a fine way of rouning off a (hopefully!) fine season. Fingers crossed!! :)

Most of all, though, I can't wait till it all starts!